Saturday, May 29, 2010

Don't cheapen yourself.

I put on my facebook status this past week,
that when I look at other people's pictures I quite frequently come to the conclusion that:
I am so happy to be LDS and married.

My mom and I had a talk while Evan and I were in Utah about how you can go so long without certain spiritual knowledge but then once you get it, you cant believe you didnt know before, and when someone else doesnt understand, you just wanna be like "DUH!"
I get this feeling a lot when I look at people's pictures (yes, on facebook.)
I look at their lifestyles, and I just CANT understand how people could argue the fact that living the gospel leads to a happy life. I truly do not feel like I am missing out because I dont get drunk and have hang overs. I do not feel that my teenage years weren't fully lived because I wasn't sexually active. I do not feel that I am less sexy because I wear clothing that doesnt show my shoulders, thighs, or half of my breasts. You can tell me all freaking day that the Church has too many "rules", and that drinking or getting high is fun, and that there is "no problem" with having a beer/glass of wine/daiquiri every once in a while, or that having sex isnt bad if you are "in love". But guess what? These so called "rules" have incredible consequences. good ones, in fact. more than I can say for engaging in these things:
so, you drink. possible consequences (however small or large, they are still possible) puking, having a hang over, getting taken advantage of, making a complete fool of yourself because you are doing things that you wouldn't usually do since you have no inhibitions (oh, lucky you.)
you smoke cigarettes. (is there a dumber thing to do???) you lose the ability to breath very well...and stink. awesome. but good thing you have that nicotine to help you when you're stressed, huh? I mean how dumb is it to build up that strength yourself, and use your brain to help you calm down...Much better to depend on something addicting. Genius.
you have sex. the obvious, STD's, getting pregnant. Okay, honestly, I remember my step mom telling me that after she got married, as much as she enjoyed sex, she didn't understand why people would give up so much for it. I couldn't agree more!
I think (correction, KNOW) that this is the thing that gets me more worked up than any other sin. Ever.
How can girls think so little of themselves? Now, I know many, many wonderful women who have made the [mistake] of losing their virginity before marriage to someone that they felt strongly for. I believe that just because this happens does not mean that you are a bad person. EVERYONE makes mistakes, and sadly this one is not uncommon.
The girls I am talking about are the ones who glory in dressing skanky, and being promiscuous, and look down upon people who are not this way.
This is my logic: You think so little about your mind, and knowledge, and personality, that you feel that the best way to get a guy to notice you is to show off half your body? Really? You have so little to offer that you cant attract a guy any other way??
Great, it makes you feel sexy. Well guess what, it also makes you look gross. How can you expect to have a good relationship if the initial attraction a guy has to you is the depth of your cleavage?? Really?
Oh, there has to be "sexual chemistry". Oh my gosh, when people bring up that thing that "you need to have sex before you get married to make sure that you guys work well together in bed"
SERIOUSLY?!?!?!?!? cos we're not all freaking HUMANS that have body parts that were MADE to work together sexually?!?!?! How about this: if you hadn't had sex with other people in the first place, you wouldnt have anything to compare your spouse to! you could discover with THEM what you like, and not have expectations that you have to "find out".
Do you know how awesome Relief Society is?? Yeah, I know it can be cheesy, cos someone always cries, and we gab a lot, and talk about sewing machines.
But looking past that, looking at the true purpose of it, it is incredible.
We are WOMEN! When I started truly understanding what that meant, do you even know how empowered I felt? I am a WOMAN. I am beautiful. I have the ability to be a MOTHER. I can create and give a child life. I can nurture, love, give, serve. I can have graciousness, dignity, quiet strength, and be TRULY attractive by living righteously. not just me. EVERY SINGLE WOMAN can become all that she is truly meant to be. To me, I cannot understand how someone could look at any of those women that would appear on the cover of a gossip magazine, put her next to a truly righteous woman of God, and think that there is even a comparison. The beauty that magnifies from a woman who understand her role in this life is beyond words. How could I ever consider wanting to look a certain way solely for the world's acceptance, when I know and understand the things that I can do to be a beautiful woman in the Lord's eyes?
I love being a woman. I love the sacred role that I play both in this world and in eternity.

Some words of James E Faust that have empowered and strengthened me in the past:
"When strong young priesthood holders see a girl immodestly dressed, most will not want to date her because her standards are not consistent with their eternal perspective. Immodesty in women cheapens their image. It causes embarrassment and loss of respect"
[a man] must never “attempt to take advantage of [you. If] … he shows [any] inclination to use you as a convenience or as a means of gratification, then you may [be sure] he is not prompted by love.” It is very natural for young men and women to be attracted to each other, but they should be attracted in God-given ways rather than questionable ways, such as immodest dress. God-given attractions include your innate beauty, charm, decency, and goodness.


  1. You need to come out with your blog on tape.

  2. You're awesome. No, really. You have the courage to say so many things that sometimes I do. And I agree 100%.

    I have arguments like this with my sister-in-law frequently. My husband's sister requested her name to be taken from church roles several years ago and we're always arguing about happiness and "rules."

  3. this is super amazing gma. you're absolutely right. :) and now i feel stupid for wearing tank tops while on vacation. haha but seriously you speak the truth and i admire you! if you weren't married i'd say you need to get your booty out on a mission with me!! i love you you're fantastic.

  4. 100% agree. the media doesn't help any, trying to make us think we need to be a certain way. what is so empowering about using your body to feel good about yourself? there is so much more to being a woman that is on the INSIDE.